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The following is from the beginning of a short story by the same title. Read “Author Bio” to learn more. **** I was recently doing a search in Google to find a website that would confirm my suspicions about a Tele-huckster—a pet peeve of mine to which I am hopelessly addicted. One thing led to another and, yada yada yada, before I knew it, my flat screen monitor began flashing a string of sexually explicit pictures in brilliant pulsating color. It was an X-rated pop-up extravaganza; one I was unable to keep up with. I clicked frantically trying to close one close-up invasion after another. The bombardment continued on until it ran its course, eventually reaching some kind of worldwide web adult abyss that even the internet could not crawl below. As I cleaned up the dirty debris I so innocently spilled—well maybe not that innocently—I was struck by my good fortune. Thankfully, the internet came along decades after my early teen years. Had this stuff been around in the Sixties, I might still be squirreled away in my attic room to this day, trimming the hair on my palms while mumbling incoherently to my seeing-eye dog. On the other hand, learning the whereabouts, general appearance and overall purpose of female parts would have been a heck of a lot easier, not to mention more timely. Instead, my sex education was really the collective result of a hit or miss operation. At the time it was torture, but I don’t know, there was something funny about it too. And it all started at my local summer recreation center, Carteret Park ... **** “What did Roy Rogers say to Dale Evans in the bedroom when the lights went out?” Mud Finnegan asked a rapt group of adolescent boys sitting around a long wooden table at our local summer hangout, Carteret Park. He was about twelve years old, a year older than I and several years older than most of the kids sitting on the benches—that was age-wise but he seemed a generation older than all us in every other way. Mud looked around, working the table like a seasoned Catskill comedian. No one dared answered his question because it really wasn’t a question at all. It was an obvious lead-in to the punch line of another classic dirty joke; besides, no one had a clue as to the possible answer—no one that is except Moon Muller. “I know!” Moon yelped in a lame attempt to impress the guys, as if he was really in the know. “Shut up! You don’t know crap!” Fitzy snapped back, warning that one of his patented headlocks might be coming Moon’s way if he didn’t keep his big trap shut. “Do too!” Moon fired back in a surprising show of bravado. “Are you two f’in jerk-offs through?” Mud, as only Mud could do, used the “F” word with a certain artistic flair. He painted masterpieces with four letter words no differently than Monet did with colors from a pallet. Having regained the attention of his fickle audience, he continued to close the deal. “Do you f'in dick heads wanna hear the f’in joke or doncha?” His eyes got wide and kind of crazy looking, one eyebrow climbing higher than the other. Of course, we wanted to hear. Everyone settled down. He waited a moment, knowing timing was everything; then, delivered the goods. “I’ll turn on my flashlight if you turn on your headlights.” A flash of universal vacant thought swept across the sea of open jawed faces, like the eerie stillness before a tornado strikes, as our feeble brains scrambled to “get it”. Then, as if prompted by an audience monitor, an explosion of rip-roaring, doubled-over laughter swept around the table. Ah … Mud sure could bring it home. Making it all the more incredulous was that most of us struggled to understand the punch-line. 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So you are standing there, ready to go, in fact busting to go - but nothing. You get to whistle all 8 verses, including the chorus of Greensleeves before anything happens. Finally something starts to happen but you feel like a street busker, all theatrics but not much action, and unfortunately you have an interval in your performance. If you thought it couldn’t get worse, wrong. Your kids have all grown up and left home, but you still have to get up 3 times a night, but not to check the kids! You just get back to sleep, and oh no, not again. As a man ages, the prostate gland may gradually enlarge and cause urinary difficulties, a condition that is called benign prostatic hypertrophy (BPH). By age 50, up to 50 percent of all men have this condition. About the size of a walnut, the prostate gland is located below the bladder and surrounds the upper part of the urethra (the tube that carries urine and semen out of the penis). When the prostate gland becomes enlarged, it restricts the normal flow out of the urethra. Some of the signs of an enlarged prostate include: - Difficulty starting the urine stream. - The urine stream is just a trickle. - The urine stream stops and starts again. - A need to urinate frequently, especially at night. - A feeling that the bladder is not completely empty. Prostate cancer, which is totally unrelated to BPH, is a much more serious health problem than BPH. If you have any of the symptoms, then you should visit your doctor to determine what might be the cause of the problem. If it is prostate cancer, you greatly improve your chances of recovery with early detection of the disease. Some of the most common treatments for BPH include: Do nothing. If the problem is only an inconvenience, and is not affecting your health, doctors often will not prescribe anything for an enlarged prostate. You and your doctor may just monitor the prostate with regular checkups. Something that has proved very beneficial has been herbal treatments, and there are some very good natural products on the market that assist in reducing the size of the prostate. Drug therapy. Men who have moderate symptoms may be given a drug that shrinks the prostate by blocking the production of testosterone. Testosterone is the drug which stimulates prostate growth. Surgery. The most common surgical treatment for BPH is a transurethral resection (TURP), in which excess prostate tissue that is restricting the flow of urine is removed with a tiny instrument inserted through the penis. (Brings a tear to every man’s eye thinking about this). This generally requires a hospital stay of 2 – 3 days. This procedure has a very high success rate, with approximately 85 percent of men being cured. So if what was once equal to the flow of the Niagara River is now reduced to the trickle of a summer stream – help is available. medical penis enlagement penis enlargment tool penis enlarement forum best penis enlagement pills vimax do penis enlargement pills work free natural penis enlarement does penis enhancement work penile enlargement pills penis enlargment forum
It is estimated that more than 19 million Americans suffer from varying degrees of incontinence. We have traditionally and incorrectly assumed incontinence to be a normal side effect of childbirth or that it is something to be expected as we grow older. Doctors now know that incontinence can be a sign of an underlying medical condition. A physician should examine all cases of incontinence. Some may treat the underlying disorder, while others may choose to prescribe a medicinal treatment. Although we have always assumed that getting older was the cause of incontinence, we now understand that there are many causes for the disorder. It is estimated that nearly 86% of those suffering can seek medical treatment and expect to see results. Results may vary from a much lesser degree of incontinence to fully regaining bladder control. While some cases of incontinence are caused by aging, most cases are signals of underlying medical issues, such as enlargement of the prostate in men and loss of estrogen in post-menopausal women. These examples highlight the importance of seeking guidance, evaluation and treatment from your physician. You can also look into the various other methods that can help to treat incontinence. Kegal exercises, which help to strengthen the pelvic muscles, are often an effective method of controlling incontinence. More serious cases may require medication, or even surgery. It all depends on the severity and your level of discomfort. Adult incontinence diapers are a good way to ease the discomfort from loss of bladder control. While you are in the process of seeking treatment, whether it is medication, exercise or surgery, you will need to decide what kind of adult diaper to choose. Your doctor can assist you in finding the best brand of adult incontinence diapers for you. Fortunately, for most suffers of this disorder, many products are available to make their lives more comfortable." pnis enlargement surgeries penis enargement pills product penis elargement forum penis enargement pump free penile enlargement tip does penis enhancement work vigrx penis enlargment pill vimax truth about penis enlargement pills penis enlargment forum
Testosterone deficiency, also known as hypogonadism, is a condition in which the testes are unable to produce enough testosterone to fulfill the body's needs. Testosterone deficiency has many possible causes, including genetic abnormalities, injury to the testes, and being on certain medications. Normal aging also may play a role in the decline of male testosterone levels. It is also known as low testosterone. The testes produce testosterone regulated by a complex chain of signals that begins in the brain. This chain is called the hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal axis. The hypothalamus secretes gonadotropin-releasing hormone (GnRH) to the pituitary gland in spurts, which trigger the secretion of leutenizing hormone (LH) from the pituitary gland. This hormone stimulates the Leydig cells of the testes to produce testosterone. Normally, the testes produce 4-7 milligrams (mg) of testosterone each and every day. After puberty, testosterone production increases rapidly, and will decrease rapidly after age 50. Recent estimates show that approximately 13 million men in the United States experience testosterone deficiency and less than 10-percent receive treatment for the condition, which is growing in cultural acceptability. Studies also have shown that some men with obesity, diabetes, or hypertension may be twice as likely to have low testosterone levels, though as stated, low testosterone and testosterone deficiency can be caused by taking certain medications, chemotherapy, infections and other basic causes. Signs of testosterone deficiency depend on the age of onset and the duration of hormonal deficiency. Congenital testosterone deficiency is usually characterized by underdeveloped genitalia, and sometimes even undeterminable genitalia. Acquired testosterone deficiency that develops near puberty can result in enlargement of breast tissue (gynecomastia), sparse or absent pubic and body hair, and underdeveloped penis, testes, and muscle. Adults may experience diminished libido, erectile dysfunction, muscle weakness, hair loss, depression, and other common mood disorders.